Borrow Strength

How do you define strength?

Who do you picture when you think of strength and courage?

And what do you do when a situation in business, or life, requires more strength and courage from you, than you have?

For me, when I find myself in a challenging situation, I borrow strength…

When I arrived in Cambodia for the first time back in 2009, I learned of a strength beyond what I knew. This first month with survivors of sex trafficking changed me. I thought I had known strong women; I had read about strong women. But this was strength beyond what I ever knew existed.

I learnt that many of them had been raped by as many as ten men a day. I did the maths. Ten times a day is 300 a month. 1800 times in six months. It was beyond comprehension.

How did these girls and women have so much strength? I couldn’t have endured for one day what they endured for months or years.

Yet they didn’t call themselves victims; they called themselves survivors. That reinforced their strength to them.

So many don’t survive. I learned that one-third die in captivity, one-third commit suicide, and only one-third get out. I wondered which third I’d belong to if it happened to me.

I don’t possess their kind of strength. I simply don’t. But I think of them often.

It was shortly after I’d returned from Cambodia that I found myself at a seminar that threw me a curveball. When I arrived for registration, I was given a form to sign: a disclaimer that they accepted no responsibility for any injury that might occur from the firewalk!

Firewalk? I hadn’t known this! And I don’t think I’d have signed up for the seminar if I had. A quick Google search told me that my skin is like paper and should burn, and my blood is predominantly water and should boil.

I realised this firewalk was a pivotal moment in what was to come. I knew that if I could do this scary thing, I could draw on the experience next time I had a scary thing I needed to do. So I pictured, at the end of the path of hot coals, girls trapped in a brothel cell, looking at me, their arms outstretched through the bars, and I told myself I’d walk over hot coals to get to them. And I did.

I knew in that moment that no matter the obstacle, challenge or difficulty involved in building and managing an organisation to protect girls, I would do whatever it took. I didn’t know how, but I’d figure it out. I’d find the strength and courage needed. 

Whenever I find myself in a challenging situation, where I don’t know if I’ve got the strength or courage I need, I draw upon their strength. I am motivated by their courage. I know that if they can survive that, I can manage what I’m going through.

If you’ve read my book Do What Matters, you’ll know about the labour dispute where I was sent to the immigration police – I borrowed strength for that too.

Who inspires you to be stronger and more courageous in your life and leadership?

#borrowstrength #dowhatmatters #businessmatters

Nicky Mih believes in our capacity to live and lead differently. Her book Do What Matters: what leading a child protection organisation in Cambodia taught me about life and leadership is an Amazon #1 best seller in the categories of Business Ethics and Business Leadership. Do What Matters is available on Amazon and freetoshine.org/dowhatmatters